modify previous essay

Hi~

My professor just give me the feedback to me to modify the essay~ She said that the overall of essay is pretty good, but it seems too broad. So her advice is for me is to specific a topic(All the staff stick with China elements). And for the Historical time part, changed into the part that described Chinese prostitution(overall introduction of the sex worker in China). And for the body paragraph, she told me that may be I can focus on the problem similar to “Government wants to renovate the sex industry, but it still exists”. For that, you can write why the government renovate, and how it still exists and etc.

 

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